Here in the Zoom Mullet Age, the prospect of coming back to work is scary enough without dire warnings designed to keep you safe; yet, as responsible employers, we gotta make rules for keeping our people as safe as possible, and we gotta make sure people know what they are. And when it comes to reminding people in the office about the need for social distancing, that means signs.

In truth, the office has been quiet, and that’s still a really good thing. With COVID-19 still spiking across the nation, we’re all for working at home. We’ve been productive since we’ve been separated, and engaged more than ever in the work we believe in.

But it’s nice to have the office, too, and seeing each other in person, as safely as we can, is pretty great. So we wanted to make sure our scary signs reminded our people that we also love them.

COVID front door sign

We are open to anyone with a key and nearly anyone with a telephone.

GI Joes with masks

House security believes in 6-inch social distancing.

Butt in/butt out signs on table

Self-explanatory.

Cover your blowhole sign

Our whale mascot inspired some nautical petitions to keep our mateys safe.

Wipe down kitchen sign

Some things are just polite.

Songs to wash your hands by

“Bodak Yellow?” Would that work?